Turning Overwhelm into Abundance

It's 3:52 am. I have been awake since 1:48 am when my daughter stirred in her crib down the hall. Since 1:48 I have been lying in bed thinking... thinking... thinking... The first thought was obviously wondering what was happening with my daughter... teething, probably. But it doesn't take long before the thought vomit comes rolling in. Imperatives and observations stacking one on top of the other. Lists being compiled of things we have to do, annoyances surfacing from the day prior, quick-witted retorts that have come approximately 12 hours too late (guess they aren't so quick witted then are they?)

I remember feeling this way one other time in my life. "This way" being so overwhelmed with thought and planning that it completely overrode any need for sleep. It was approximately one year ago when I was 37 weeks pregnant and opening our little yoga studio in 2 weeks. My most profound pregnancy meltdowns happened that week. We laugh about them now.

This sense of overwhelm obviously isn't unique to me. We all go through seasons in our lives when we are pregnant with expectations - we are building a new thing and wondering how in the hell it's going to get done in time. Even if we aren't necessarily "building" a new thing, perhaps we are preparing... for the holidays ahead, a big milestone celebration, a new house, a new marriage, the end of a marriage, a new job, the end of an old job...

But what is this stress we put ourselves through really? This stress is life and the abundance of life experiences. It's the pressure of wanting to make the holidays perfect for your kids so they can have the most wonderful childhood memories. It's the stress of wanting the risks that you take to pay off ultimately and experiencing the dread or perhaps the thrill that maybe you've taken a misstep. In our case, it's the pressure of building a new business that will contribute to our community in the most positive way possible. No matter how you look at it, all this stress.. all this overwhelm... it's all for good, and it's a sign of the wealth and richness we have, and from that perspective, it all comes into focus. 

As my mom always reminds me... "the harder you work, the luckier you get". I think I'll keep that in my back pocket for today when my 1 am wake up comes to bite me in the ass...